Stuck in a Rut? Step into the light!
LISA'S STORYÂ Â Â Â Â Have you ever thought about what might be engraved on your tombstone when you die? Lisa is absolutely certain her engraving will read: Here lies a woman who never had any time for anything. That's exactly what she says. All the time.
Lisa wants to go back to college and get her degree, but with a husband and two kids to take care of, she doesn't have time to study. She wants to go to the gym, or perhaps go to yoga classes, but she doesn't have time for that, either. She doesn't have time to get together with girlfriends, doesn't remember when was the last time she went to the hair salon - and shopping? Whenever she does head for the department store it's strictly the Children's Clothing or Housewares Department for her. She doesn't have time to do anything for her - just her.
Lisa loves her family, so she feels guilty for feeling less than satisfied with her life. But she's also frustrated, sad, and even despairs sometimes that all she'll ever do for the rest of her life is care for her family.
STUCK IN A RUTÂ Â Â Â Â Â Â Lisa is absolutely and unequivocally stuck. Stuck in a rut a lot of women get stuck in and find it hard to get out of. And what do we do? Do we go on with our daily chores and tasks and continue complaining OR do we try to change something?
Sadly, most of us remain stuck. And dissatisfied with the life we live. What does it take to get unstuck? Is it really that hard?
HERE'S SOME HELPÂ Â Â Â Â Â In my book, Become the Person You Were Meant to Be, I explain the difference between being in the shadow and being in the light. When we are in the shadow, we rely on inappropriate reactions, habits and behaviors to deal with our issues. In Lisa's case, she's often moody, irritated, and blames her family as much as she blames herself for not being able to pursue her dreams. She feels helpless and wallows in self-pity.
On the other hand, when we are in the light, we resort to healthier habits and reactions. We feel things like gratitude, self-awareness, and acceptance. We don't assign blame, but rather seek change.
CHANGE OUR MIND - CHANGE OURÂ DESTINYÂ Â Â Â Our state of mind (whether it is negative-shadow or positive-light) controls each moment of our life. And our moments add up to create our destiny. The good news is that we can learn (or train ourselves) to be mindful, and recognize each state of mind and change it if it is shadow so that we can confidently step into the light. This process is as physical (we must manage stress and also rewire our brain) as it is psychological!