Gain Self-Confidence and Happiness with Gratitude
There's a strong correlation between happiness and confidence; in fact it's hard to have one without the other. I've read stacks of books on happiness, and if you want to know more about how to be more happy, the one I'd recommend is Authentic Happiness by Martin Seligman.
But if you want to save yourself some time, I can tell you that the biggest tip from every book I've read, guru I've heard and teacher I've learned from on the topic of being happy is this:
Develop an Attitude of Gratitude.
Start making a habit of expressing gratitude for anything and everything positive in your life. Send a "Thank You" card to someone who has helped you out. Make eye-contact next time you thank someone, and mean it. Take time out from your busy schedule to stop and reflect on something positive in your life, and allow yourself to feel the feelings of gratitude. Send an SMS to the friend you hung out with yesterday, saying how much you appreciated the conversation. Resurrect the lost art of gratitude, experience the positive feelings it gives, and watch the way people respond positively to you. Your self-confidence will grow.
Even look for the lesson in the adversities in your life, and start working towards feeling grateful for what it is teaching you. Don't be hard on yourself if this sounds unappealing or difficult at first; it may take time to change your perspective and begin finding the nuggets of wisdom buried in your suffering. Spend less time ruminating on the things in your life that aren't working, and more time on those that are. As I write this, I'm recovering from Chronic Fatigue, an illness which devastated my life for the past three years. For the first couple of years, I focussed on how sick I was and how miserable I felt; a totally understandable response to such an all-pervading illness. When I focus on what I can contribute to other people and what I can feel grateful about it distracts me from the fact that I still feel tired most of the time and the resentment I feel about that. And hell, it won't kill me. I'm lucky it's not something more serious, and that makes me feel grateful.
If you feel too resentful or depressed to ruminate on gratitude for long, it will be because you have unexpressed anger. Don't judge yourself, but take a quick detour and deal with your buried resentment first by reading Step 16: Get In Touch With Your Anger in Confident Man.
So kick back now and think of all the things in your life that you're grateful for. Keep coming up with new ones whenever you have a moment to spare and you'll start feeling happier; and more confident.
This is one of over 50 activities in the Confident Man Free Confidence Building Course.